Immediate Gratification
You know you want it. You have got to have it. The surge of adrenaline heightens your senses and you can almost taste the fulfillment of your wish. You rationalize all the reasons that you will die without it. You need it, this minute. Life will never be the same again. So you get it. And for a brief moment, you live the thrill.
Then it hits you. The intense excitement turns to a horrible disbelief. As the pleasure fades, you realize what you did. You cannot take it back. You have created your own misery.
You can tear down in one moment what it takes a lifetime to build: trust in a marriage, confidence in a friendship, respect in your family, recognition in your profession, and love for yourself.
Were you trying to prove a point, get revenge, or defy someone with your action? Did you hope to get noticed, get attention, to do something shocking and finally be seen? Did you just want to feel alive? Were you trying to do what others least expect, to impress someone, or to take risks out of anger? Did a savvy sales associate notice your insecurities as you made a purchase beyond your means? Were you just bored, lonely, or acting out your sadness by doing something you promised to avoid?
When you react to life in this way, you allow circumstances to control you. If you choose to allow pressures to drive your decisions, then you do not act from your heart. You deny your true self, and sabotage your success. There are other ways to feel alive, other ways to feel good about life and satisfy the emptiness with true fulfillment. Self-sabotage is not the answer. Stop living under the control of your impulses, and determine to respond to life with strength and character.
Sometimes a person has a chemical imbalance that needs medical attention to aid in impulse control, or a severe addiction surrounds every decision made. If this is you, get to a doctor, get medicine, or break free from the addiction. Only you can decide to get better.
In most cases, however, the difficult task of delayed gratification is surprisingly simple to accomplish: commitment to your principles with every bit of your energy. When you feel the urgency to do something impulsive, determine to stop and give yourself some time. Think, pray, and listen. Why is it so important? What will happen if you wait, or if you never do it? What will happen if you do? Is it worth it? No excuses. Others may have influenced your past, but only you determine your tomorrow. Help others by sharing your stories in the comments: tell us what helps you respond to the desire for immediate gratification when you know the impulse will force your life train off track. I have added links in the comments section below to some posts where I share what helps me.
To live without regret is to be happy. To be happy is to fulfill your God-given purpose in life. To fulfill your purpose, you need a purpose-driven life. What is driving you? Be the person you want to be, who God calls you to be, with every choice you make. Have you hurt yourself or others with your choices in the past? Get forgiveness and make it right. Then start over today. You can do it!
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[…] Patricia presents Immediate Gratification posted at A Better You Blog. […]
The advice here is sound and practical. You have hit on a very real subject that I myself have to wrestle to the ground rock still more often than I would like to admit. Asking the right questions can unearth the real need below the surface of desire. Nice work.
The missing link here for me was the writer being the first one to dive in sharing personal failures and eventual success in this slippery area of life. While the advice is solid I found no connection with the writer’s own vulnerability. Is the writer speaking from a place of experience after much pain? How has the writer accomplished what is being advised? How has the writer’s life been affected by self-sabotage?
You first… then I’ll share. You go deep as the example and then I’ll follow. Who is Patricia?
Feel free to respond privately via email if my comments do not serve your blog forum. Be assured, my comments are not made with any malice but with sincerity.
Mr. Besilly,
Thank you for your comments, and welcome to A Better You Blog! I have no problem responding through the comments, in fact I think this is a great way to start the comment trail for this post, especially for new readers who visit this blog. I have also added a sentence in the post to reference the links I list in this comment.
As you browse through the archives, you will find out a great deal about me. Most of my posts are on the long side, necessary because they are filled with short personal stories that do exactly what you ask, sharing my vulnerabilites and failures along with my triumphs. I also try to include some shorter posts for inspiration, such as this post, as sort of a “food for thought” type of motivation to encourage readers on to success.
As I write, I think of all that I want my children to learn about life, and all the ways I can encourage them to dream and achieve. I then share what inspires me to inspire you. I hope you feel at home here as you visit.
It is important to know who is talking when you listen to any advice. So, to help you and anyone new here get started with your questions about who is Patricia, in addition to the About Me section, here are a few posts I’ll suggest from the archives. You will see I try to “go deep” as you say, while conveying how to get free of your past by focusing on your future:
Managing Stress: 5 Steps For A New Approach To Life
Eating Disorder Recovery, 14 Years Free: You Can Break From Addiction or Bad Habits Too!
5 Steps to Overcome Fear of Failure
The Big Picture (my first post)
Thanks for your questions. Share your own stories any time.
By the way, Akismet (a comment spam protector for Wordpress Blogs) has caught over 4000 spam in the few months since I turned comments on! I browse the spam filter regularly, but if anyone has tried to post and never seen their comment appear, try again as it may have been lost. You can also email me if you are having problems posting.
Patricia
Carnival of Diet Tips…
Welcome to the March 23, 2007 edition of a very public diet!. We love reading all your tips so thanks again for some great posts. Patricia presents Immediate Gratification posted at Patricia, saying, Whether you are trying to eat healthy…
Thank you for pointing me to the past. Your About Me section really says quite a bit as does your (first post). That was the deeper stuff I was looking for. It does convey who Patricia is.
I enjoyed your perspective on thinking of your children as you write. I would hope someday that they would discover your body of work with great joy. Cheers!
[…] Patricia presents Immediate Gratification posted at A Better You Blog. […]
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[…] Patricia presents Immediate Gratification posted at Patricia. […]
Sound advice and a well written article. Having the will power to say no when you really want to say yes gives you an immense amount of personal power.
Great advice here. I truly enjoyed reading this article….”To be happy, you need a purpose driven life.” - (hits the nail on the head.)